Sometimes the brain goes on holiday without the body......
this place here/ear
has knowledge knows/nose
yes aye/eye
navel loo head
dyslexic snail Brian/brain
inheritor heir/hair
Windsor()Bowes-Lyon nee/knee
nautical left - (erm) stern - um/sternum
secret meeting (minus T) (w) rist
Friday 15 September 2017
Thursday 14 September 2017
does Big Ears live at Cragside?
There are a few weeks when summer and autumn overlap, when there are still strawberries to be had, but also plums; green beans and squash; cobnuts and mushrooms, raspberries and blackberries.
Startlingly bright lilies and fiery crocosmia share space with flowering ivy, the last nectar-rich shrub to bloom.
The evenings are getting shorter, cooler and the mornings pinker, damper. There are still a few bats about, but the swallows have gone and the house martins are not far behind. Ducklings have lost their fluff, but not yet grown their adult feathers. Spiders spin their webs in terraces across paths, sparkling with dew, catching the early unwary human.
And the television is full of adverts for computers and iphones (indispensable for the new school term). It used to be school uniforms, but these are either bought at the beginning of the holidays or perhaps not at all.
The landscape entices us to all go out walking, foraging, to return home to turn the bounty in to preserves which will enliven winter meals.
Well, the preserves can be made, with or without the foraging.
It is so satisfying to look at a shelf crowded with assorted jars and bottles, holding the promise of wonderful tastes, shining with the mellow colours of autumn.
Crab apple jelly, Piccalilli, Peach+Apricot chutney, Tomato+basil dip, Damson jam and Damson Gin. Old fashioned bottles of loveliness.
A few days away and a walk which was filled with unusual fungi. Heaven!
And a surprise seen at the edge of the road made me wonder if children's stories had been written in this woodland. A fly agaric, which everyone knows is the home of pixies!
So do you think Big Ears might be from Northumberland?
Startlingly bright lilies and fiery crocosmia share space with flowering ivy, the last nectar-rich shrub to bloom.
The evenings are getting shorter, cooler and the mornings pinker, damper. There are still a few bats about, but the swallows have gone and the house martins are not far behind. Ducklings have lost their fluff, but not yet grown their adult feathers. Spiders spin their webs in terraces across paths, sparkling with dew, catching the early unwary human.
And the television is full of adverts for computers and iphones (indispensable for the new school term). It used to be school uniforms, but these are either bought at the beginning of the holidays or perhaps not at all.
The landscape entices us to all go out walking, foraging, to return home to turn the bounty in to preserves which will enliven winter meals.
Well, the preserves can be made, with or without the foraging.
It is so satisfying to look at a shelf crowded with assorted jars and bottles, holding the promise of wonderful tastes, shining with the mellow colours of autumn.
Crab apple jelly, Piccalilli, Peach+Apricot chutney, Tomato+basil dip, Damson jam and Damson Gin. Old fashioned bottles of loveliness.
A few days away and a walk which was filled with unusual fungi. Heaven!
And a surprise seen at the edge of the road made me wonder if children's stories had been written in this woodland. A fly agaric, which everyone knows is the home of pixies!
So do you think Big Ears might be from Northumberland?
Tuesday 25 July 2017
... and a three-legged poodle
I do like to travel. It's the journey, therefore the 'to' is not so important. There is always something to catch the eye. An oddly shaped tree decorated as a scarecrow; a farm shop which sells not fresh fruit and veg, but 'funky vintage furniture'.
Being designated navigator, the map throws up quirky places - Edvin Loach, Edwyn Ralph, Sollers Hope, Hints. And my favourite, Hopton Wafers.
And then the wildlife. When you are stuck in traffic (roadworks, tractors, whatever), there is time to watch the hedges, the verge, the sky. I still struggle to identify raptors but a female blackbird spreading her wings over her brood to shelter them, is just my level. And a gift.
Arriving is good if the room is clean and the shower works. Good weather, interesting food and a family get-together, makes it great.
I had three creme brulee - one was rich, creamy with a cracking top. Two was small, creamy, crispy top and served with apple crumble and apple sorbet. Three was a Coffee and Baileys which had a crisp top and a very creamy base. A bit weird.
The first was simple and very good.
I had two risottos. Sometimes the portions can be just too much.
Coffee was - variable. Very good and served with Lemon Bakewell tart and/or an enormous chunk of Chocolate Brownie Cheesecake. Or depressingly predictable unless topped up with Coffee Tequila liqueur. Smelt very alcoholic. Maybe too alcoholic.
The trip came to an end with the photograph of a beautiful trumpet-flowered plant, over-hanging the car park wall (taken for identification purposes) and a hurrying dog-walker, pulled along by three snuffling pugs and, yes, a three-legged poodle!
Being designated navigator, the map throws up quirky places - Edvin Loach, Edwyn Ralph, Sollers Hope, Hints. And my favourite, Hopton Wafers.
And then the wildlife. When you are stuck in traffic (roadworks, tractors, whatever), there is time to watch the hedges, the verge, the sky. I still struggle to identify raptors but a female blackbird spreading her wings over her brood to shelter them, is just my level. And a gift.
Arriving is good if the room is clean and the shower works. Good weather, interesting food and a family get-together, makes it great.
I had three creme brulee - one was rich, creamy with a cracking top. Two was small, creamy, crispy top and served with apple crumble and apple sorbet. Three was a Coffee and Baileys which had a crisp top and a very creamy base. A bit weird.
The first was simple and very good.
I had two risottos. Sometimes the portions can be just too much.
Coffee was - variable. Very good and served with Lemon Bakewell tart and/or an enormous chunk of Chocolate Brownie Cheesecake. Or depressingly predictable unless topped up with Coffee Tequila liqueur. Smelt very alcoholic. Maybe too alcoholic.
The trip came to an end with the photograph of a beautiful trumpet-flowered plant, over-hanging the car park wall (taken for identification purposes) and a hurrying dog-walker, pulled along by three snuffling pugs and, yes, a three-legged poodle!
Saturday 1 July 2017
Of lost things...
It is raining and we can not find the best umbrella. We went for lunch the other day and it was only thanks to a kind and observant waiter that it wasn't left at the table. Today, when it is needed again, it is no where to be found. Is it lost then, left on the train, perhaps?
I feel old.
There is a new(ish) sandwich bar on the main road, with a sign on the door -
"Were hiring"
Is this a ' sorry if you want a job, but it's too late"? A victim of the dreaded predictive text? Or simply another case of a missing apostrophe?
(Did I mention I felt old?)
There is a website that can put you in touch with the railway lost property office. You just have to be able to describe the missing item. (Was it red, black and square? Or green, black and square?)
I wonder if there is a home, a lost property office for all the missing punctuation? An index drawer in some retired librarian's filing cabinet, perhaps, where all those apostrophes, semi-colons and brackets join together and dance through the cobwebs.
After a settling cup of coffee, the umbrella was found in the boot of the car. Of course, we had been shopping that day and not on the train at all!
The apostrophe, from the sign on the shop door, is still missing.
I feel old.
There is a new(ish) sandwich bar on the main road, with a sign on the door -
"Were hiring"
Is this a ' sorry if you want a job, but it's too late"? A victim of the dreaded predictive text? Or simply another case of a missing apostrophe?
(Did I mention I felt old?)
There is a website that can put you in touch with the railway lost property office. You just have to be able to describe the missing item. (Was it red, black and square? Or green, black and square?)
I wonder if there is a home, a lost property office for all the missing punctuation? An index drawer in some retired librarian's filing cabinet, perhaps, where all those apostrophes, semi-colons and brackets join together and dance through the cobwebs.
After a settling cup of coffee, the umbrella was found in the boot of the car. Of course, we had been shopping that day and not on the train at all!
The apostrophe, from the sign on the shop door, is still missing.
Tuesday 30 May 2017
The first in life
Beginnings can be bewildering.
Dry instead of wet. Air, not liquid.
Loud, bright, blurred. Not quiet, dark, closed.
Shout.Shout.Shout.
Then listen.
Soft, calm, susurration.
Familiar, comforting.
Wet, then dry, then prickly outside.
(Calm, gentle, murmur.)
Warm, wrapped, held close, familiar.
Suckle, snuggle, soothed.
Stretch, dream, cough, sneeze.
(What was that? Everything goes WHAAA - then not. What?)
Snuffle, soothed. Cold on skin then soft murmur, familiar sounds, gentle rocking.
Dream again of before, then snuggled, suckled, soothed.
(Calm, gentle, murmur.)
Hiccough, taste again, snuffle.
Sudden jerk, soothing sounds, now familiar.
Strange people, strange sounds, all new, all bewildering.
So sleep, soothed, gentle sounds of familiar beings, remembered from before, a fading before.
Dry instead of wet. Air, not liquid.
Loud, bright, blurred. Not quiet, dark, closed.
Shout.Shout.Shout.
Then listen.
Soft, calm, susurration.
Familiar, comforting.
Wet, then dry, then prickly outside.
(Calm, gentle, murmur.)
Warm, wrapped, held close, familiar.
Suckle, snuggle, soothed.
Stretch, dream, cough, sneeze.
(What was that? Everything goes WHAAA - then not. What?)
Snuffle, soothed. Cold on skin then soft murmur, familiar sounds, gentle rocking.
Dream again of before, then snuggled, suckled, soothed.
(Calm, gentle, murmur.)
Hiccough, taste again, snuffle.
Sudden jerk, soothing sounds, now familiar.
Strange people, strange sounds, all new, all bewildering.
So sleep, soothed, gentle sounds of familiar beings, remembered from before, a fading before.
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